I’ve been running a business for around 13 years, if there is one thing I hate above all else it is the questions women are asked that no one would even think to ask a man.

First, let me define sexism for readers. Merriam-Webster defines it as:

• How do you balance work and life? Um…is that even a serious question? I run a business, no one has fucking work/life balance you twit.
• How old are your kids? This one is my favorite, I’m not even asked if I have kids, it is a given I would have them…because what woman doesn’t fulfill the role they are placed on this earth for? By the way, sarcasm is heavy in this blog. Read on if you dare.
• How is your little business doing? Oh really good, between keeping up on housework and making delicious meals for my husband, I have managed to run a business for 13 years that is fueled on the tears of interns.
• How does your husband deal with your schedule? I don’t know, I chain him to a bed and feed him periodically…seems to be fine when I see him.
• Do you only hire attractive females? Yep, all ugly trolls are stopped at the door and sent on their way.
• How does your husband feel about all the men you spend time with? What a great question! Well, I make sure any male that is within 10 feet of me is made aware that I am happily married, then I flash my ring in his face and only talk about what a wonderful man my husband is…I make sure to really drive that point home. I also review my schedule with my husband every Sunday so he knows who I’m meeting with and when, he then gives me permission to run my business.
• There is still time to have kids. I know, I know, this isn’t a question…it’s a statement…which should say it all.
• Who will take care of you in your old age? If that is your retirement plan, you are a moron. What kid wants to be strapped with their aging parents? I plan to have 100 dogs and they will probably eat me when I pass away. Too much? Ah well, thanks for asking.

I had to stop at eight or this blog was going to be a novel, maybe there will be part 2, depends on demand.

Before you get all defensive, I know these questions are not ill-intended but that in no way makes them excusable. 

Stop. Think. Then open mouth.

I’m really sick of answering these questions, I’m also sick of women being viewed as a weaker sex that somehow can’t share in the same accomplishments as a man. As women, we get defensive and begin listing all the things we do, manage and keep together to ensure everyone around us is taken care of…and we need to stop.

Listen up ladies, stop being so damn nice about sexism. Be sarcastic, forceful, abrasive, aggressive, forward (all the adjectives that are used against us) in your responses.

For example “Why don’t you have kids?”

My Answer: “My uterus was ripped out by scavenging bears, I’m lucky to be alive…thanks for bringing up that painful memory.”

See, easy peasy. Don’t let sexism win or be excused.

I had a great conversation this past week with good friend of mine, who is in an influential and important role in Grand Rapids. She was looking to amplify her brand, meaning raise her profile in the community. Although she is very involved in the community, which is a huge part of her job, not a lot of people realize her level of engagement or the breadth of that involvement. Why? Because if it didn’t happen on social media, then did it really happen at all?

I know this sounds utterly ridiculous and in some ways it absolutely is, however we now live in the digital age which affords us a lot of opportunities but also takes away anonymity. Unfortunately, you can’t have it both ways.

My advice to my friend on increasing her visibility within the community, was the following.

• Utilize social media to educate, inform and share your life. There are multiple ways to do so, which I’ll cover in the next few bullet points. Start with Facebook and Instagram, Twitter is a time suck and the network is losing the relevancy it once had.
• When you attend events, go to meetings or are giving a presentation; be sure to check-in on social media with an explanation of what you are doing. This broadcasts your involvement to the community and also allows those attending the same event to find you and network.
• Share photos of your adventures. If you are walking in downtown Grand Rapids, grabbing coffee, attending an event, grab a photo and share with your followers. This showcases you are out and about and involved. I realize this may seem silly, but how often do you check social media in a day? 12 times? 15 times? Too many to count?
• Post articles or blogs you have written or feel will educate on a certain issue that is important to you or relevant to your job. This will help position you as knowledgeable, informed and thoughtful.
• Take advantage of either Facebook or Instagram Stories. Have fun with it! Show a more personal side, take pictures with your dogs, put on those damn bunny or dog ears/nose, make a video, get your emoji game on…the possibilities are endless.

For this blog, I focused on social media as a tool to increase your visibility, there are so many ways to do so, but all roads lead back to social media when it comes down to communicating what you are up to.

Looking for more resources or articles on personal brand, check out the below blogs.

• Why you can’t afford to ignore personal branding
• The value in speaking
• Make your own opportunities
• Becoming the salesperson of you

Yesterday, 8THIRTYFOUR officially celebrated 11 years with our community, clients and staff. While our anniversary gave us an excuse to throw a party, our intent was much more powerful than that. Our message for the evening was the “Power of Small Business,” which we highlighted with a superhero theme. To me, small business owners are superheroes. They tackle challenges and failures on a daily basis while continuing to push forward. We have a vision in our head of what we want our business to be and who we want to help and we refuse to give up.

As a member of the Small Business Association of Michigan (SBAM), I am surrounded by super heroes every day. Associating with these badass business owners has lead 8THIRTYFOUR to truly embrace what makes us a great company. Our dedication to our community, clients and culture are what separates us from the rest. It is hard for me to embrace kudos and show pride for 8THIRTYFOUR and all we have accomplished in the last 11 years, however, it is necessary.

When we choose our clients, we do so knowing we can help them meet the integrated communication goals they have for their company. We won’t work with businesses we don’t believe in and we won’t take you on if we can’t help you. Our clients trust us and recognize our value and for that I am damn grateful.

From the bottom of my heart, thank you for trusting 8THIRTYFOUR with your brand and for believing in the power of small business. We didn’t just throw a party, we threw a message and I hope it resonated with those that attended.

As a small business I am a big supporter of shopping local, that being said I also hate shopping so if I can’t buy it online, I won’t buy it. I do make some exceptions, like if it involves booze.

This season, no matter where you are, you can support small by shopping small, all from the comfort of your home. Here are my top picks for Small Business Saturday, Black Friday or Cyber Monday.

1. NODDA Shirt. This is pretty much the best invention ever if you are sick of your husband, boyfriend,
   

   NODDA Shirt – www.noddashirt.com

   dad, brother, male in your life looking like a slob. If they refuse to wear a button down because it is too bulky or they just hate nice shirts, then order them a NODDA Shirt and they will look dapper for all your upcoming holiday parties. All shirts on sale for $18 from Black Friday through Christmas.

2. Shefit. Don’t worry guys, if you don’t have any idea what size to buy, returns are super easy. This local West Michigan company is running a special that offers any in-stock sports bra for$30. This will run Wednesday 6:00 a.m. EST (23rd) to Midnight EST Cyber Monday (28th).
3. Fido & Stitch. If you are obsessed with all things dogs, then give this local business your support. Whether you make a grooming appointment or order that much-needed Christmas sweater for your dog, they have a huge variety of items. Their inventory is somewhat limited online, however their store is awesome and parking is easy.
4. Bird and Feather. We all have that one friend that has everything and is impossible to buy for. If you are looking for something truly unique, why not give the gift of greenery. Bird and Feather specializes in high quality, easy to assemble air plant kits inspired by the intersection of nature and modern design. Each kit is designed to inspire a sense of wonder and bring soul healing beauty to even the of smallest places.
5. Gray Skies Distillery. Just recently this awesome West Michigan distillery released two new spirits, Single Malt Whiskey and Apple Brandy. As part of Grand Rapids’ Cocktail Week they put together a package that customers can purchase online that consists of a bottle of hooch, tasting glasses and slate coasters. You can purchase through their Eventbrite page, but will have to pick up at their tasting room.
6. Michigan Pantry. If you are looking to support Michigan businesses, then Michigan Pantry has you covered. This little shop assembles gift baskets that feature Michigan-made products offered throughout the state. They have gift baskets, boxes, candy, cookies, nuts, beer, wine and more. Their prices are incredibly reasonable and would make great hostess gifts.

I hope you will take the time to support local businesses this holiday season, there are lots of great deals out there and if you enjoy shopping stop by area shops and purchase some unique items you won’t find online.

Are there other local shops that sell online? Share in the comments.

I’m a feminist. This is a surprise to no one. I am very loud about it and I am very proud of it. I was raised to be independent, challenge society’s norms, speak up and to support other women.

As a woman business owner, it is important to me that women are properly represented throughout all industries, in all professions and within the community. Recently something happened that made me very disappointed in our community, ashamed really.

This past week, a list was released of young professionals who are seen as leaders in our community. Out of the 40 finalists on the list, 9 were women. 9. Let me say it again, 9. Did you know that 51% of Grand Rapids’ population is women? The list should, at the very least, mirror the population of the area. Looking at the list as it stands, one would assume the city is 70 to 80% men.

I know what you’re thinking, “Bode, it’s only an award – what is the big deal?”

According to the United Nations, “Gender equality is not only a fundamental human right, but a necessary foundation for a peaceful, prosperous and sustainable world.”

So, yes something as silly as a professional award being given to 31 men and 9 women is important. It is an indicator of where we stand as a community as it relates to gender equality.

I stumbled upon the website genderavenger.com and this sentence jumped out at me, “If enough of us point out the absence of women to enough people in charge, change will happen, and a new norm will emerge.”

So, get upset, get loud and demand change. We are women and we sure as hell will roar.