Today is International Women’s Day, a day to celebrate women and their achievements internationally. It’s nice we get a day, isn’t it? The 2021 theme is “Choose to challenge.”

In the spirit of challenging, I’d like to stop thanking men or rewarding them for being “allies.” Why the hell do we spend a day or hell our lives acknowledging men who uncharacteristically didn’t treat us like shit? I, for one, refuse to give men credit or thank them for where the hell I am in my career. Apparently, the rationale is we can’t ascend the corporate ladder or to the c-suite unless men take us along with them or support us in our pursuit of leadership positions.

No.

I started 8THIRTYFOUR because it was clear the traditional path to leadership was closed to me. Here is what I want you to take from this blog, we as women must be brash, bold and absolutely unapologetic. This doesn’t mean you bulldoze through people, it means you push, pull, and barrel through barriers to get what you want.

Women who make history are not polite or reserved. Take Eleanor Roosevelt, for example, she was a feminist and civil rights leader before we even knew what to call them. People either loved her or hated her, but regardless she persisted in her journey to ensure the unrepresented were represented.

If you aspire to be liked by everyone, you will never achieve your dreams. This is a hard pill for women to swallow, our empathetic nature drives us to be well-liked. In fact, it will always be something you struggle with. I am not liked by all, I’ve been told I am an “acquired taste,” not exactly a ringing endorsement but I’m actually pretty damn proud of it. I am loyal and fiercely protect those I love, but I also call out injustice when I see it. Does it bother me when I hear about negative things said about me or gossip between other women who dislike me for the personality I was born with? Yes, it does. Acknowledge it, see what you can learn from it, and then move the hell on.

At the end of the day, a man is not going to get you where you want to be professionally nor is anyone else. I am not saying relationships are not important, they absolutely are, however, you have to believe in yourself and your capabilities first.

Be brash, bold, and unapologetic. Let’s make some history.

My most hated phrase of all time is, “hey do you have a second to chat?” There is never ANY good news that comes with that question. If you ask any business owner what is the hardest part of owning a business, they will without a doubt say, employees. Whether that is attracting, retaining or growing them – it is really flipping hard. And without a doubt, they will leave at some point, believing otherwise is only going to leave you scrambling when it happens.

8THIRTYFOUR’s talent has always been relatively young, some first year grads or those with maybe a year under their belt. When we began operating on EOS (Entrepreneurial Operating System) we took a hard look at how we were hiring, the experience we needed and the growth we anticipated in the next 3 to 5 years. We brag about our culture a lot and it is pretty great, however, to really value it, an employee needs to have perspective. What I mean by this, is they have to have worked someplace else for them to truly appreciate what makes 8THIRTYFOUR different. When they truly see the difference, we can retain them longer and show them how they can continue to grow in their role.

As we continue to grow our team, there are valuable lessons to learn from employees when they leave. Here is my advice for when an employee leaves, I’d like to say I’ve always handled it like this but the truth is you tend to take things very personal as a business owner and it’s hard to step back and see the big picture sometimes.

Listen & Learn:

We hold exit interviews when our employees leave, and we ask them to be brutally honest. We ask questions like 1) What did you like about your role? 2) What were the hurdles you faced? 3) What could leadership do better? 4) What would you change about the role?

Be sure to customize the questions based on the position and who they report to. We have gotten really great feedback from former employees during the exit interview, which has resulted in changes company wide. The best thing you can do, is learn, analyze and adapt.

Analyze & Adapt:

Feedback is useless if you don’t do anything with it. It isn’t always easy to hear where you’ve stumbled or failed, but it’s absolutely necessary. Reflect on the positive, embrace the negative and change it. Think how awesome it is get honest feedback you can then put into practice.

Follow-up

Just cause their leaving doesn’t mean you’ll never see them again. Maintain the connection, check in periodically and follow their career progress.

Growth is hard and with it comes staff changes. It’s all part of the joy of business ownership.

We have a saying at our office, “keep the monkey.” Yeah, it’s weird, but here is the point. You’ve heard people say, “I have a monkey on my back.” They’re referring to a problem or issue they can’t resolve that is hanging over their head. Human nature is to pass the monkey off to someone else so you get it off your back and move on. The issue is, the monkey is now the next person’s problem.

It’s also really f*cking lazy and kind of a dick move to just “pass the buck” or monkey, if you will. Basically you didn’t feel like solving it so you made it someone else’s problem. It drives me INSANE. For example, you ask, “hey so and so, where is the file for this?” Instead of looking where you know the file is, you are asking someone else to do it for you, cause it was easier to make them do it then to find the answer yourself. Stop it.

I was actually just chatting with some of my staff today about this! Someone reached out to us with a question, something they could’ve easily resolved themselves. In fact, they asked the exact same question the month before…let me repeat…exact same question. What do we do? We drop everything to respond and find the answer for them. Here’s the issue with that.

• Productivity for the day was thrown off to be reactive to another person’s “question.”
• Multiple team members also jumped into assist…cause that’s how we do at 8THIRTYFOUR. Now several people are working on this person’s issue ahem question.
• Now we’re all frustrated and venting to each other, so there’s that.
• And now I’m writing this blog cause I’m annoyed.

This is not an uncommon occurrence within companies, in fact, we’ve addressed it multiple times as a team. You might be asking yourself, “what’s the big deal, just find the answer and move on.” Sure, sure – fair enough. What if you receive 15 emails, chats, or calls like this every day? Suddenly you’re spending half your day “putting out fires.” Other people’s fires.

Here’s what you do.

• Don’t respond immediately.
• Set aside time in your schedule/calendar to dig into the issue.
• Respond to said lazy person with “I’ll check into this sometime this week and circle back (throw some passive-aggressiveness in there) once I’ve had a chance to look into.”
• Then wait…9 times out of 10, the person will solve their issue before you even have to do anything.
• If that doesn’t work, push back. Do it respectfully (that’s where don’t respond immediately comes in), give it a breather, and then deal with it.

The best thing you can do is to not respond right away, you have to set boundaries or you’ll continue to be derailed by these damn monkeys and before you know it, you’re running a f*cking zoo (and writing blogs about it).

I know we’re all sick of the word pivot, but I gotta finish the blog series so just hold on through this last part. If you’re new to this riveting blog series, read Part 1 here and Part 2 here.

Let’s wrap this sucker up and discuss the painful steps I had to take as a business owner to ensure my company survived and continues to survive this damn pandemic.

Step 3: Planning

Our office manager and I spent a lot of time on this phase, we sat through countless calls and webinars with the Grand Rapids Chamber and the Small Business Association of Michigan determining how to implement what we had learned in the education phase.

The key to our success, thus far, is absolutely the people and companies we surrounded ourselves with. Always hire people smarter than you and retain companies that possess the expertise you don’t.

The first thing we did was map out our priorities and the steps we needed to take:

• Finances: We knew we had to layoff staff immediately, apply for funds available through grants and the federal government, and cut expenses. We determined what grants we would go after, identified the information we would need to apply, and then reached out to our accountants at Hungerford Nichols to pick their brains on other options.
• Layoff: I pride myself on being very transparent and honest with my staff. Once we made the difficult decision to layoff two staff members, we set a date and asked other staff to work from home that morning to respect the privacy of our two employees. Our office manager sat down with each of them and assisted them in applying for unemployment as well as providing them the information they needed from 8THIRTYFOUR. We also checked in with them weekly to see if we could offer any other assistance.
• Staff conversation: We spoke with staff immediately and let them know the tough decision we made. We answered any questions they had and talked about next steps. I honestly thought they would think I failed them, I certainly felt like I did. They were amazing, I honestly could not ask for a better team, they were understanding, complimentary, and appreciative. It was an incredible relief the way they handled it.
• Work from home: I know of multiple companies that struggled with their employees working from home. It was definitely a transition for us. We wrote up a policy, purchased Zoom to stay connected, and adhered to our same hours…although I had to step in when staff was working too much. It’s one of the reasons we wrote the blog on working from home guilt. I was concerned they would become burned out.
• Staff morale: Our team thrives on togetherness, we all really like each other, and being a small team we are pretty tightknit, not to mention very social. To keep spirits up, I sent packages bi-weekly to their homes. I sent a journal with notecards, an inspirational book, and a coloring book and markers. It was as much for me as for them, I wanted them to know how much I appreciated them.
• Worst case scenario: My leadership team and I mapped out our worst-case scenarios to help us plan our steps to recover. We outlined milestones that if we hit we would take the next step in the plan. For example, if we lost another client, we would cut staff salaries or we would negotiate our office rent.

Step 4: Action

I’m not going to map out every action we took, but below is what we were absolutely consistent on which I truly believe set us up for success.

• Daily internal check-ins
• SBAM daily briefings, including the weekend
• Calls and emails with our banker, accountant, and lawyer
• Research, research, and more research. We read every piece of information out there – PPP, EOs, and every other acronym.

We also worked around the clock, we had calls on the weekend and were in constant contact. Well, things have started to settle down, we know returning to work is our next big priority.

We lost revenue, employees, and a lot of peace of mind…but we survived. Years from now I will reread these blogs to give myself some much-needed perspective when things seem dire for a completely different reason.

Let’s get back to where we left off in Part 1: Pivot!, I wanted to go into more detail about the steps we took, the organizations that stepped up in a big way and how we set 8THIRTYFOUR up to move forward.

To say life changed overnight for us would be an understatement, it was like all that we knew was turned on its head and we had to start rebuilding immediately. What I’m going to share with you below, we outlined in less than 24 hours and implemented in less than 48 hours. There are 4 phases – assess, educate, plan and action; we’ll cover the first two in this blog. We are still in the action phase, which we anticipate will last us for a while.

The reason we were successful, was because we acted quickly, we had tough, honest discussions as a leadership team, we each had a role and we took ownership and because our culture was built on honesty, transparency, and empathy. If we were not an EOS company and we didn’t have the existing culture we had, I can honestly say we would be one of the businesses that closed our doors forever.

Step 1: Assess:

As soon as we lost business, we took a hard look at our finances, current workload, and asked ourselves the following:

1. What $$ was anticipated within the next 30 days? What did we actually expect to receive?
2. With that revenue number in hand, we then took a look at expenses – utilities, rent, salaries, technology, and more. What could we cut? Where could we negotiate? What could we delay?

We had our numbers, we had our projections and now we needed to anticipate next steps:

1. If we cut staff, would the workload be manageable for the remaining staff? What slack would leadership need to pick up?
2. If cutting staff isn’t enough, how much could we scale back salaries temporarily and still retain employees?
3. What other clients would we lose? How would this impact us on a monthly basis?
4. What options are out there for us for financial support?

We imagined the worst-case scenario and then we planned back from there.

Step 2: Educate

I honestly believe this is an area where a lot of businesses dropped the ball, and it caused a lot of anger and ultimately some pretty disgusting protests at the capital. At the end of the day, you can only control what you can control and you gotta suck it up and move forward. This shit is hard on everyone, I have zero tolerance for whining and anger. It is your job as a business owner to educate yourself and explore every possible resource out there, instead of sitting around bitching about how unfair life is. Do that by yourself with a bottle of wine, your employees deserve better.

In the beginning, no one had any idea on how long this would last, how our businesses would be affected, or what we could even do to offset the inevitable hurt coming our way.

The following organizations, associations, and companies were our lifeline.

1. Small Business Association of Michigan: Each day at 3:00 p.m., SBAM held briefings to share the latest news, resources, and what small businesses could expect moving forward. Every single day, including weekends. It was invaluable, they pivoted their entire operation and all staff was focused on COVID-19 and helping small businesses navigate the new normal. This was how we got the much-needed clarification on the PPP (paycheck protection program).
2. Grand Rapids Chamber: I wasn’t personally on these calls, but our office manager was. The topics ranged from laying off employees, PPP, financial assistance, insurance and safely reopening. I have never been more grateful for my membership.
3. Hungerford Nichols: Our accounting firm is a bunch of badasses. They checked in, just to see how we were and answered the countless questions we had around taxes and PPP. Heather, their marketing person sent me messages each week with words of encouragement. I love this company.
4. West Michigan Law: Our lawyer Adam is funny, sarcastic and blunt – it’s everything you could ever want for legal representation. I had the most random questions for him and texted him at all hours. In response, I got sound advice and some pretty great memes.

Let’s be honest, anything the government put out was unclear and difficult to navigate, these organizations stepped up in a big big way, working around the clock to help us. It wasn’t just companies, it was the countless people that reached out to me and the list is long. I had the support of other business owners, friends, colleagues, and family. I wrote a note for these peeps, I’ll share access to soon.

In part 3 of this riveting blog series, I’ll tackle the planning and action phase.

It’s been a while since I’ve posted, been a little busy ensuring we survive this damn pandemic. Priorities, I suppose.

The first week, we lost over $15,000 in revenue a month, which does not include the clients who simply couldn’t pay but would when able. This happened on a Tuesday, by Thursday I made the difficult decision to lay off 2 employees. This was all within 3 days. As a small business owner, you don’t get the luxury to debate a decision for weeks or months, you have to make the shittiest decisions in days, if not 24 hours.

I’ve always been the individual that identifies the worst-case scenario and then plans for it. Quite frankly, it’s why 8THIRTYFOUR has been around for 13 years. It isn’t exactly the most pleasant way to live your life, but it has made me a survivor in both my personal and professional life.

After employees were laid off, I sat down (when you could still do so in person) with my leadership team and we took a hard look at finances. What was our projected revenue, actual revenue and revenue lost and what did we anticipate losing in the future. Once we had the worst-case scenario mapped out, we came up with a plan to retain existing employees ideally at their current rate of pay – we had another plan if that wasn’t possible. We then strategized on how to communicate the need for marketing at a time when everyone was hurting financially, and then we put some money behind it and then launched the campaign.

So, we took action, made a plan, and then starting implementing. In other words, we pivoted…we hella pivoted. I saw a lot of business owners being hit hard, I knew some had to shut their doors indefinitely. There were two groups with two very different mindsets: 1. This f*cking sucks, but it is what it is and I gotta pivot; 2. We will never recover, how could the ____ (insert name) do this to us, it is everyone’s fault. I will now rant and rave on social media. The one thing they agreed on, it sucks, what set them apart was how they chose to respond.

I’ll map out the steps we took as a company in the next blog, but simply put it was assessment, education, planning and action.

If I hear the word “unprecedented” one more time, I’m going to scream. We are being bombarded by news by the time we wake up to the time we finally put our phones down and go to bed…then we dream about it. Everyone keeps giving advice on how to weather this storm, what to spend your time doing or how you should be acting during this time…well screw that.

Here is my non-advice, take it or leave it…because no one gets to decide how you deal with this shitstorm, but you.

Eat whatever you want

Stop showing me healthy recipes and workouts I can do from home. If I feel like moving, I’ll move. This may be considered terrible advice, but eat what you want, drink what you want and shower if you feel like it. We may all come out of this a few pounds heavier, so embrace it and eat your feelings. If you want that extra glass of wine (or bottle), no one is stopping you. The best part about this situation is the only one judging you is your dog and they’re just happy you’re around them 24/7.

Write about it

I sent my team journals to document this “unprecedented” time in our history. Write those feelings down, whether it is how you hid in a closet all day to escape your children or watched The Tiger King for the 14th time. In a year or two when you are dealing with what feels like an insurmountable situation, look back on this time and it will give you a much-needed perspective.

Adopt a friend

Seems like every time something crazy happens in the world, people dump their pets. By the way, if this is you, you’re an asshole. Help out a local animal shelter by fostering, it will keep you from going insane and you’ll save a life. That’s a win-win if you ask me.

Bring back letter writing

I’ve been mailing notes and cards out at a record pace. You wouldn’t believe the joy people experience when they get words of encouragement in the mail. My buddy Ashley and I have done this for years, neither one of us enjoys talking on the phone so we write to each other. Write notes to local nursing home residents, they are stuck in quarantine and can’t have visitors.  Think about that the next time you are feeling bored or lonely, their life depends on self-isolation…so suck it up buttercup and do something nice for someone else.

Zoom a virtual happy hour

I just did this with my team on Friday, I even put make-up on and showered. It was a big day for me. Check-in on those friends,  preferably with a glass of wine in your hand. It’s kind of funny to watch people get drunk virtually. I’m particularly hilarious.

We don’t know when this will end, for all the small businesses out there and those currently unemployed I pray it is soon. In the meantime, surround yourself with the people and things that make you happy and don’t let anyone tell you the right way to “cope” or “isolate.” You wear those pajamas for the 14th day in the row and have that dance party in your living room with no one judging you (your dog is totally judging you).

You do you and fuck COVID-19.

As if running a small business wasn’t hard enough, now we’re dealing with a pandemic. At this point, no one has any idea what that will mean for second-stage companies (between 10 to 99 employees), so we sit and wait. Waiting is not something we do well as business owners.

Here is what we know:

• The financial market is taking a hit
• Events are being canceled
• Large companies are asking employees to work from home
• Our health care system is overwhelmed

Here is what we don’t know:

• When will the spread slow?
• How long will this go on?
• Will the market stabilize?
• What will the effect be on our businesses?

There are a few options for moving forward.

Curl Up in the Fetal Position Option

While a popular choice, it will more than likely cause an adverse effect on your business. While it is nice to bury your head in the sand or hide under your covers with your 200 rolls of toilet paper, it won’t solve anything and you’re contributing to the panic.

Educate and Respond Option

Personally, I suggest this option. I met with my leadership team today and we talked about the coronavirus. It was not something we wanted to address but for the business and employees, it was a necessity. We broke it down by what we knew, 1). We are a small company and for now, are as safe as we can be working at our office; 2). If you sniffle, you stay home; 3). We must conduct business as usual and continue to serve our clients; 4). It is important for us to continue to educate ourselves and make informed decisions and finally 5.) Don’t panic, it is not going to help anyone. Stay calm, informed and for the love of all that is holy; wash your hands.

There is so much we don’t know and human nature seems to be “fill in the blanks,” which only makes it worse.

We are all going to be ok.

I’ve been running a business for around 13 years, if there is one thing I hate above all else it is the questions women are asked that no one would even think to ask a man.

First, let me define sexism for readers. Merriam-Webster defines it as:

• How do you balance work and life? Um…is that even a serious question? I run a business, no one has fucking work/life balance you twit.
• How old are your kids? This one is my favorite, I’m not even asked if I have kids, it is a given I would have them…because what woman doesn’t fulfill the role they are placed on this earth for? By the way, sarcasm is heavy in this blog. Read on if you dare.
• How is your little business doing? Oh really good, between keeping up on housework and making delicious meals for my husband, I have managed to run a business for 13 years that is fueled on the tears of interns.
• How does your husband deal with your schedule? I don’t know, I chain him to a bed and feed him periodically…seems to be fine when I see him.
• Do you only hire attractive females? Yep, all ugly trolls are stopped at the door and sent on their way.
• How does your husband feel about all the men you spend time with? What a great question! Well, I make sure any male that is within 10 feet of me is made aware that I am happily married, then I flash my ring in his face and only talk about what a wonderful man my husband is…I make sure to really drive that point home. I also review my schedule with my husband every Sunday so he knows who I’m meeting with and when, he then gives me permission to run my business.
• There is still time to have kids. I know, I know, this isn’t a question…it’s a statement…which should say it all.
• Who will take care of you in your old age? If that is your retirement plan, you are a moron. What kid wants to be strapped with their aging parents? I plan to have 100 dogs and they will probably eat me when I pass away. Too much? Ah well, thanks for asking.

I had to stop at eight or this blog was going to be a novel, maybe there will be part 2, depends on demand.

Before you get all defensive, I know these questions are not ill-intended but that in no way makes them excusable. 

Stop. Think. Then open mouth.

I’m really sick of answering these questions, I’m also sick of women being viewed as a weaker sex that somehow can’t share in the same accomplishments as a man. As women, we get defensive and begin listing all the things we do, manage and keep together to ensure everyone around us is taken care of…and we need to stop.

Listen up ladies, stop being so damn nice about sexism. Be sarcastic, forceful, abrasive, aggressive, forward (all the adjectives that are used against us) in your responses.

For example “Why don’t you have kids?”

My Answer: “My uterus was ripped out by scavenging bears, I’m lucky to be alive…thanks for bringing up that painful memory.”

See, easy peasy. Don’t let sexism win or be excused.

I just got back from a relaxing vacation with my girlfriends, we spent our days laying on the beach, sipping cocktails and reading.

Instead of fully enjoying my vacation, I allowed negative thoughts and self-doubt to creep in the entire time.

These are thoughts I am uncomfortable sharing, because it leaves me vulnerable (and I have a reputation to uphold), however I am hoping by opening myself up you’ll cut yourself some slack.

Thought 1: I’m fat

How can I wear this suit? I would give anything for her body. I need to lose weight, eat better, drink less, exercise. I’m so gross, how can my husband even find me sexy. I hate my legs, my arms, my stomach.

I know I’m not alone in having these thoughts. How sad is it that instead of relishing the fact that I am in the Keys, hanging out with amazing women, I allow self-criticism to sneak in.

Love the body your in, so what if you have wrinkles, love handles, age spots, cellulite, thighs that rub, a plump stomach – who gives a shit.

The more often we tell each other we are beautiful, the sooner we will start to embrace who we are and ignore that voice in our head.

Thought 2: I shouldn’t be vacationing

Why did I take this vacation? There is too much going on at work, I should be at the office. If I pick up a book to read for leisure, I think “I should be reading that business book, I purchased.”

Why is it that when we take time for ourselves, the guilt creeps in. As a small business owner, I need to be working all the time – that is what I signed up for…right?

Thought 3: I’ll never be good enough

This one is a combination of all the negativity that swirls around in my head, aimed at myself.

• I suck at running my business
• I am a terrible manager
• I am an awful friend
• I don’t spend enough time with the dogs
• I am neglecting my husband
• I need to not eat that
• Don’t drink that
• I look terrible in this

If you looked at me, you would think – damn she is confident, isn’t afraid to say what she thinks, she is strong…blah blah blah. We all have self-doubts, I have a lot of them. There are times it is crippling and I go into hiding. My friends have dubbed it, “hermiting.” I don’t answer the phone, refuse to leave the house, lay in bed – I’m depressed, burned out, tired.

We expect so much of ourselves and refuse to grant ourselves any grace. Lets be the grace for each other. Reach out to another woman today and tell them they are worthy, beautiful and loved.

On this International Women’s Day, embrace your strength and cut yourself some damn slack. You are worthy.