The holiday season is upon us and it comes with all the fun and stress. I’m not an expert on navigating the holidays, but I’ve survived so far and I’m pretty good at managing chaos, so here are my tips for surviving the holidays.

Just as a reminder, always put your mental health first, you shouldn’t hurt yourself to make others happy.

Family you choose

For some reason, holidays turn loving families into the Griswolds or Ralphie’s dad from the Christmas Story. Grandpa is going on and on about the NRA, mom is trying to keep the peace, your siblings are guzzling wine and you’re currently hiding in the closet to avoid discussing politics – hurts to be the only liberal in the family. If you would like to avoid the trauma, drama and karma…opt out of the family gathering and host a friendsgiving and friendsmas. Invite the people you like, assign them a dish to bring (skip the fruitcake) and gather around your own table for food, friends, and fun.

If the guilt of missing a family gathering is too much for you, might we suggest showing up for hors ‘de oeuvres and a few drinks? You made your appearance, now go preserve your sanity.

Escape

Plan a getaway, whether it is a cabin in the woods or a hotel with a pool for the kiddos. Family time can be done in small doses. If you are committed to seeing your family, then set up one-on-one time with them away from the drama.

There is no rule that you HAVE to do things the way they have always been done. Break the cycle.

Make new traditions

Just because it’s always been done one way, doesn’t mean it has to stay that way. If there are individuals within your family who feel the same way as you about holiday gatherings, set up a time with them away from the drama.

I do this with one of my sisters-in-law and nephews. I don’t want nor need to be in the middle of a family Christmas where we all pretend to like each other, refuse to address the elephant in the room and I have to drink a bottle of wine just to make it through the evening. It isn’t worth it.

Fight it out

The other thing you can do is put on your fighting gloves and duke it out. I don’t suggest this option, as it is impossible to reason with some family members and you will only leave frustrated and angry.

At the end of the day, you need to do what is right for your family and your sanity. The holidays should be a time of celebration and joy, not ulcers and anxiety.

What are your creative ideas for managing the holidays?

A growing business is a blessing and a challenge. Hiring is one of the hardest endeavors, regardless of business size. When you have an entry-level position you are hiring for, you are most likely dealing with new grads or those with a year experience.

I have found these roles the most challenging to fill. The rule with the Entrepreneurial Operating System® (EOS®) is to hire slow, fire fast. We definitely have the first one down. Culture is such a fickle thing, that is incredibly important to find someone that will integrate well into your team, as well as do an exceptional job. Maybe I am biased but I want anyone I hire to stay with 8THIRTYFOUR for a long period of time, if not forever. I realize this is not realistic, but a business owner can dream.

Some of the scenarios I have encountered along our hiring journeys are listed below along with recommendations.

Applying

When drafting your cover letter, be sure to address it to someone within the organization. If you are not sure who (try Google and their website), call the company and ask for a name.  Never, ever address a cover letter “Dear hiring manager.” We are a small team, I am the hiring manager.

Other “mishaps” that will automatically drop you out of the running:

• Grammatical errors in your cover letter or resume. Seriously? Have someone proofread it or just run spellcheck.
• Addressing the cover letter to the wrong person. I have no words for this one.
• Having the name of the company you applied to previously…in the cover letter. Yeah, that’ll be a no for us.
• Misspelling the name of my company. This shows me you really did your research.
• Applying for the wrong position. Did you even read the job posting?
• Taking several days to respond to an interview request. Clearly, you are ready for the hustle and bustle of agency life. Don’t use the spam excuse, you can check that daily.
• Responding with salary requirements well outside the position range (when it is listed in the job posting). Thanks for wasting my time, also Google “cost of living in Grand Rapids vs. Chicago.”

The Interview

It can be nerve-wracking walking into a company and being cross-examined. Some of the scenarios we have encountered leave me completely baffled. Avoid these missteps.

• Showing up excessively early, be there 5 to 7 minutes early. Do not show up 15 to 20 minutes early.
• A limp handshake. Gross. A handshake should be firm, brief and strong.
• Dressing too casually. Even if you are applying for a company that has a laidback dress code, show up looking polished in a blazer or other appropriate office wear.
• Acting entitled. I have had interviewees request, in the interview, to work a 4 day week. Seriously?
• Negotiating raises and a higher salary in the interview, after already giving us your salary requirements. This should go without saying, do not bring up money in an interview. There is plenty of time to discuss compensation, raise structure, holidays, vacation time….after the offer.
• Preparing properly with research into the company should be a given. When asked why you are interested in working for us, have an answer prepared. Read recent blogs, review LinkedIn profiles, do a simple Google search and be prepared to ask questions on the company.

After The Interview

• Follow-up is encouraged, to a certain extent. Calling the office every day, then cell phones, sending emails, thank you notes, etc. is a little over the top. We will let you know when a decision has been made.
• Questioning the hiring process. Every candidate is different, meaning there are different interactions required prior to making a decision. Asking if “this is typical of your hiring process,” sends the entitlement vibe. Be thankful a company is investing in ensuring you are the right fit, so both parties don’t end up hoodwinked.
• Reaching out to all current employees. To a certain extent, this is encouraged, however when asking intrusive and somewhat combative questions…just don’t.
• If you are offered the job, congrats, don’t ask for a week to think it over. Don’t apply for the position, if your end goal is to not actually take the job.

I could go into more “what not to do” scenarios, but then this would turn into a novel. In my next blog, I’ll share stories of interviews that blew me away.

Have horror stories of your own? Share them in the comments below, please don’t let me be alone.

Am I the only one, who had never heard this saying, until recently?

According to the internet, that is always right in all these types of things, the Sunday Scaries are:

…the anxiety that sets in on Sunday nights with the impending return to the office, school, or work. Whether you call them The Sunday Scaries, The Sunday Blues, The Fear, The Shakes, The Dread – they’re there.

Now that we have defined this feeling that comes over us on a Sunday, let’s do something about it.

1. Acknowledge the feeling. The first step in conquering the “Scaries” is to acknowledge they exist. I remember as a little girl, not wanting to go to bed on Sunday night because it meant a new week, full of school, homework, classmates and the unknown. As humans, we are naturally anxious, maybe it dates back to when we were fighting dinosaurs for food…we are always thinking “what if,” and find it impossible to live in the now. Grab a notebook and write down why you are dreading the next day, knowing what you are tackling makes all the difference – now it isn’t the unknown.
2. Make a plan. Good job, you’ve written it down. Look it over, is it really that scary? Next, number another sheet of paper. Prioritize what you need to accomplish tomorrow, put the crap you don’t want to do at the top. Procrastination is in our DNA, but that doesn’t mean you can’t conquer it. Lists fix everything.
3. Tackle it now. Do the first thing at the top of the list, if you followed directions, it is the one thing you are dreading the most. If you take care of it before Monday even hits, you’ve already won the week.
4. Reward yourself. Congrats, you managed to trick yourself into getting something done on a Sunday. Pour yourself a cold beverage, or pop those pizza rolls in the oven (make sure you have ranch – you’re not a heathen) and try to relax.

Mondays don’t have to be scary, if you prep a little on Sunday and know what to expect the next day, you’ll kick the Sunday Scaries in the ass.

Ever find yourself scrolling through Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn…all the photos in your phone…the latest Ann Taylor sale…basically doing anything but tackling the looming project that is due?

I’m convinced it is human nature to procrastinate, it just feels natural to find reasons to not do something. It’s like we are wired to avoid emptying the dishwasher, riding the Peloton, or writing that blog.

Putting things off, actually hurts us emotionally, physically and monetarily. In a survey of 10,000 people by Carleton University’s Procrastination Research Group, 94 percent of respondents said that procrastination negatively affects their happiness. A full 19 percent said the effect is extremely negative.

Side Note: There is a group that studies procrastination, how often do they put something off…I wonder?

There is no secret formula for motivation, for me…guilt and the fear of letting someone down drives me. It doesn’t mean I’m jumping out of bed at 6:00 a.m. to ride 10 miles on the bike, meditate for 30 minutes or read a book…it does mean, I get shit done.

You have to force yourself to do it, even when you don’t want to. 

I tell staff, do the item on your to-do list that you are avoiding doing. Get it over with, you’ll find yourself a hell of a lot more productive when that one task isn’t hanging over your head.

Make yourself be motivated, there is no magic wand to suddenly make yourself productive. It is just pushing yourself and doing the crap you don’t want to do…first.

Set a routine

My mornings consist of me getting up, getting ready and getting out the door. Some people like to run a marathon, write a novel, achieve world peace…all before 6:00 a.m. Well, good for them.

No routine is right or wrong, do what works for you. I work in the evening, after I leave the office, I tackle things that are ‘quick wins’ so I can focus on the big stuff the next day.

Celebrate success

Acknowledge your wins. When you knock out a 35-page strategy, reward yourself with a bottle or two of wine.

It’s never to late to end the cycle of procrastination. Be realistic with yourself, you’ll have good and bad days.

We are blogging maniacs at 8THIRTYFOUR, we blog twice a week or more depending on breaking industry news. That is a lot of content to create, which means we have learned a thing or two along the way.

Here are some of our blogging non-negotiables.

1. It’s all about the relationship. Readers need to feel a personal connection to a brand, and that means you gotta give a little of yourself to build loyalty. We blog a lot about marketing, PR, digital, design…but we also talk about our favorite patios, stuff we do to unwind and more. Communication is all about building relationships, and to do that you have to foster a connection on a deeper level.
2. Provide value. Think ‘how-tos’ or checklists. Just recently we wrote a blog about the best times to post to social media, broken down by network. Readers could download an infographic, that they could use as a guide when scheduling social media. See…value.
3. Be funny (no pressure). Don’t take yourself too seriously, brands that incorporate humor into their content come across as more relatable and engaging.
4. Share the responsibility. No one person in our company is expected to generate all the content and we often will collaborate on blogs with each person inputting their piece.
5. Share real world results. Any company can talk about how great they are, it is when you show results of a project or campaign that readers will take notice.

These are just a few of the things we have learned from 11 years of blogging. What do you think?

As entrepreneurs and business owners, our days are anything but consistent. It is a word we loathe, how can we possibly be consistent when everyday is full of surprises and the unexpected.

Here is the deal, when we are consistent, we see the results but it takes commitment. It is so easy to put things off, procrastinate and be complacent…but we can’t do that. As business owners we should have a schedule that addresses the different facets of our business.

• Money is key to running a business, which means you need to set time every month to review finances, reconcile charges, categorize expenses…etc. It is a wonder our bookkeeper has not killed me…numbers are my least favorite thing so reviewing them and understanding them takes a lot longer for me. However, it is a necessity.
• Team meetings to keep all work and internal projects on track need to happen weekly. We sit down as a team 3 times a week and each meeting has a different theme – what is coming up, what big projects are in process, current events and brainstorming. If we don’t connect on a regular basis, our connection as a team suffers and in turn our clients don’t receive our best work.
• Leadership meetings happen weekly on Mondays. We do a temperature check on culture, employees, agency health, upcoming projects, business development and more.
• Quarterly strategy meetings are also an important part of “consistency”; we do an offsite full day session each quarter to do a deeper dive into all things 8THIRTYFOUR -we have our goals mapped out quarterly, yearly, etc. This keeps us on track for the bigger goals we have set.
• Mondays are no meeting days, sometimes (rarely) that gets broken but it is our time to plan for the week, connect on all client activities and work ahead.
• Bi-weekly on Fridays we meet as a team and tackle 8THIRTYFOUR marketing activities, community engagement and spend time bonding as a team. We know we have to be intentional about culture, if we aren’t then everything suffers.

My advice is, stop fighting consistency and build it into your week, month and year. The rewards will become evident when you stay the course.

What are your priorities when it comes to consistency?

Don’t have a heart attack, but I currently have 1,215 emails in my inbox. Are you hyperventilating? Take a deep breath, here’s a paper bag – I hear you can breath into it and it helps.

If it makes you feel any better, I don’t categorize or file my emails. If I am at 1,214, I know that I have 0 unread emails. I have a system, it is just a system that gives other people anxiety. I sent an article around the office the other day by Tim Herrera of Smarter Living; the article addressed procrastination. If we are honest with ourselves, we all put off the tasks we like the least. I bet you just thought of that task right now…

So how the hell do we go about changing what is so ingrained in us to naturally do?

1. To steal from Nike, JUST DO IT. Start out your day tackling the one thing you have been putting off for heaven knows how long. Schedule time on your calendar, say an hour or two to focus on that one task.
2. If it is a larger project, then spread it out over a few days or weeks (as needed – don’t get carried away). My suggestion would be to do it first thing in the a.m. that is when I am at my most focused. It probably has something to do with the mass amount of caffeine I have consumed.
3. If you are feeling truly introspective, you can write down all the reasons you have avoided that certain task. Is it time? Does it require confronting someone? It is something that does not come naturally to you; such as writing?

If you take my inbox as an example, I know it will take me HOURS to organize it and there are other tasks that are more pressing. Here is the deal though, it hangs over my head and I know that it affects productivity because I spend a lot of my time searching for certain emails. If they were categorized by clients or type of communication, I would be able to find it in less time – leaving more time for those other important tasks.

What do you think? What tips do you have for avoiding procrastination (get it)?

Dear Sarah Sanders:

It’s time. No one is debating your talent, well some are, but we are all beginning to question your sanity. I mean, how much abuse can someone subject themselves to? Do you believe the stuff you are saying anymore?

The Public Relations Society of America (PRSA) code of ethics clearly states, “We adhere to the highest standards of accuracy and truth in advancing the interests of those we represent and in communicating with the public.” As a PR professional with a stellar career, up til a few months ago when you took on your newest role, I am sure you are very familiar with code of ethics and have taken the pledge personally.

As a reminder of what is expected of a PR professional, whether you are a member of PRSA or not.

A member shall:

• Preserve the integrity of the process of communication.
• Be honest and accurate in all communications.
• Act promptly to correct erroneous communications for which the practitioner is responsible.
• Preserve the free flow of unprejudiced information when giving or receiving gifts by ensuring that gifts are nominal, legal, and infrequent.

You have broken every single one of these guidelines – well maybe not gifts, pretty sure no one has you on their gift list. Besides the obvious screw ups,  journalists are the reason we exist and your treatment of them is horrific, I mean truly awful. Your job is about managing reputation – you have got to laugh out loud at that one. A career in PR involves gaining understanding and support for your clients or the President, as well as trying to influence opinion and behavior. You’ll use all forms of media and communication to build, maintain and manage the reputation of your clients. It does not involve defending lies, fake news accusations and misleading the public. Just stop.

My wish for you, is that you will do what is best for your career before it is too late. Resign, apologize and do better. You are an embarrassment to our field and are giving all of us PR practitioners a bad name.

I have a rule that has served me well in my 15+ year career, only work for those you respect, like and see your value. If you take this to heart, you will set yourself up for success. You will only sink your career continuing to represent this lunatic and defending the irreversible harm he is doing to our country.

Above all else, respect yourself, because no one else will unless you do.

Sincerely,

Kim Bode
Fellow PR practitioner and concerned citizen

I made the decision to go see a business coach/counselor/therapist – whatever you want to call it….and it was the best. Granted, I’ve gone once but I’m clearly already cured. Jokes aside, I’ve written plenty of times about feeling alone as a business owner.

It took a swift kick in the ass by my managing director to go to the appointment. I mean, I could keep whining on my blog or I could do something about it. Trust me, I seriously considered the first option.

Here is what I want you to remember:

• Ask for help. Whether it is your leadership team, your mom, your dog – it doesn’t matter. Just ask.
• It’s ok to go talk to someone. It’s even better if they are a trained professional.
• Listen to them. If they tell you to get a hobby – then maybe try cooking, reading or wine. If they tell you to get a personal assistant – then do it.

Also apply here.

Let me repeat, it is ok to ask for help.

Is gratitude lost in todays society, never to be found again? Am I jaded in thinking that younger professionals want things handed to them without first working for it? It would seem the self-worth of millennials is much higher than others perceive it to be. Is this anyone else’s experience?

I want to share a few pieces of advice for young professionals from an old 38 year old.

1. See a need and fill it. Don’t wait for your boss or work buddy to ask for help, offer. If they need something and you are able to help, then do it. Think of others before yourself. This doesn’t mean you become someones doormat, it means you make yourself irreplaceable. A well-rounded professional is self-aware and observant of those around them.
2. Say thanks. I don’t care if it is the minuscule thing, say thank you. A server takes you order, say thank you. You are praised by a colleague, boss or whomever – say thank you. Those two words are so powerful and should be the most used in your vocabulary.
3. Self-reflect. Recognize and acknowledge the opportunities that have been afforded to you. It is so hard as human beings to not take things for granted. Some of the worst bosses I ever had, taught me the most valuable professional lessons. Really reflect on where you are in your career, the culture you exist in and the other individuals around you. Being reflective and thoughtful can save you a lot of headaches in the future.
4. Learn by example. Who in your company or professional circle do you admire or wish to emulate? What has been their career path? Find out their story, the hard work they put in to get where they are and then learn from it.
5. Be patient. You will not know everything overnight and you are not going to be a leader by saying you are. That isn’t how it works, wouldn’t that be nice if it was? I have spent the last 10 years of my life growing 834 and I failed a lot and pretty spectacularly, if I do say so myself. Before 834 I had 2 great jobs and 2 really terrible jobs. I learned from both and better understood my capabilities and weaknesses.

What is most important for young professionals is perspective. Your first job out of college is your opportunity to prove yourself and work your ass off. You will not be handed anything, you will not be coddled and there will not be “safe places” where you can feel feelings.

Regardless of how great you think you are, it isn’t your opinion of yourself that matters. It is how other professionals and management see you and that, is completely up to you.